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November 17, 2004

Gno-man's land

Checking my watch, I shifted uncomfortably in my lecture-hall chair.
My day well-worn, but nowhere near over.
Waiting for my class to start, secretly wishing I could be somewhere else:
having lunch with you. Taking that break from reality for just a second.

But it was not to be, and I knew it.
So I rested my head in my hand and prepared my neck for another 9 hours
of having to hold it up.

And then ... and then...
there you were! There you were!

You wonderful, magical, brilliant man!
There you were!
Your face. Your sweet face; different, but just as I remembered.
A little less of the world in your eyes, perhaps,
but they still danced with light as they always do in my mind.

And you taught me about hazardous chemicals,
the importance of protective goggles,
the difference between flame-retardant and flame-proof,
you set platinum blonde wigs alight before my very eyes!

Burying my face in my hands, I giggled like a child in church.
My face turned red, my eyes teared,
a wide and uncontrollable smile broke out across my face.
I mean, everyone was laughing - you're a funny guy,
but I was really laughing, even at the silly jokes.
I was so happy to see you there! I so enjoyed watching your antics.
As well as your haircut- and I wondered if you got it
at a Hairporte.

And when it was all over, and my cackling subsided,
I raced down there to see you; to jump around, to pinch you.
Like a kid at Christmas, I was eager to play
to shift my weight impatiently; to pester you with questions.

I tore joyfully down the aisle until I ripped through your image.
For when I reached you, you had vanished.
You were only a two-dimensional you, I realized.
And I wished there could have been just one more dimension.

But man, that was some trick.
And it was just for me.
And it made my fucking day.

Posted by kati at 12:00 AM

November 14, 2004

Wu Tang is for the children

R.I.P. O.D.B.

Ole' Dirty Bastard, or Big Baby Jesus, as you like to be called in later years.
Nevermore will we ride along in your limo as you collect food stamps.

"It's free money! Who doesn't want free money?"

The Grammy-winning thunder of Shawn Colvin will never again be stolen
and replaced with unintelligible shouting and looks of total confusion on live TV.

True, you almost lost your life in the 90's by wandering in front of exploding pyrotechnics while performing on MTV, but thankfully Pras and Mya were there to avert disaster. But Final Destination with Devon Sawa teaches us one undeniable truth, that the Grim Reaper can be stalled with chit-chat for only so long, and that your time would inevitably come.

So long, you old dirty bastard.
No one yet knows why or how you died.
But we'll miss you.
I mean, people will miss you. I just know it. Gold teeth and all.

"You and Mariah, went back like babies and pacifiers."
Yeah, yeah, I was down with it.

Posted by kati at 11:15 PM

November 12, 2004


Says the absolutely insane and may I say very creepy woman who my parents employ to clean their house twice a month:

"You know, I definitely prefer you up at Davis instead of in San Diego. You don't need all that. That influence on your life. You don't need that filth." Metaphorical spittle flew from her mouth to emphasize her distaste.

"Now you can marry a nice farmer or something. I tell you what, you may think what you're doing now is smart, how you're living, but these little problems, when you get to be my age, they come back to you."

I cock my head to the side and gaze vacantly at her, doing my best imitation of Dianna's creepy neighbor's cute puppy.

"You know, even though they might be square, there's a lot more security in them than people who just look cool."

ok. thanks.
You total nutbar.
I keep asking my parents to terminate her employ.
This woman really shouldn't have keys to our house.

Posted by kati at 01:02 PM

November 10, 2004


It is my opinion that most of us,
if we're lucky,
encounter a small number of people with whom we can be hopelessly in love.

To clarify, I don't mean simply in terms of a romantic relationship - by "hopelessly in love" I am referring to that scenario when you are so fond of a person that even the thought of them not accepting your adoration is enough to send chills down your spine.
Like you are so crazy about them that you almost can't stand it, and you'd be totally smitten with them even if they hated you.
You want to make them laugh, or ask their opinion, or dote on them, or be around them, or encourage them, anything.
They make you light up.
The relationship itself is varied: maybe a sister, a parent, a lover, a child, a good friend, a mentor, a protege.
It happens all the time with musicians or movie stars: Just a hopeless, unjustifiable, unrelenting love. A permanent crush, if you will, although not always a sexual one. When I first heard the term "people crush" from a friend, I knew that was it.

If it's a celebrity crush, it's likely not reciprocated, and therefore not terribly special.
What I mean is those couple of times in our life -if we're lucky- when a person we feel this way about, quite simply, doesn't hate it.
Maybe they accept it, maybe they ignore it, maybe they (gasp!) feel and act similarly, or maybe they just think it's silly and cute. Whatever they do, the important thing is that they don't get a restraining order, because that would mean that they didn't like it.

It's about these people, these too-good-to-be-true kind of people, that we do the most freaking out. The ones who we feel lucky to love, maybe.
I guess that's why we only get a few shots at it. It's lots of work.

Posted by kati at 01:14 AM

November 08, 2004

Is that a fact?

"Babies are delighted by bubbles-
except when they are gas bubbles,
trapped in their tiny tummies."

I just learned this.
I'm glad someone told me.

Posted by kati at 01:39 PM